We went to feed Lucy tonight. I was worried that she would sleep the
entire time. I was a little worried that she had forgotten me. But she
was pretty alert and I believe she remembers me. She even did a great
job latching on. Now if I could only sit long enough to feed her.
The last time I saw her in person, I thought she really looks like
Alex. It is a little strange to wrap your head around breastfeeding
your brother and not be weirdes out. But tonight, I think that she
looks like my baby pictures. It’s amazing how she changes everyday.
Based on my limited breastfeeding experience, it reminds me of Dorothy
walking through the field of poppies on the Wizard of Oz. One night I
tried to feed her for over an hour on the left side. By the time I
moved to the right, I fell asleep within five minutes. Goodbye any
mild form of insomnia I may ever have. I just need that baby topless
snuggled up under my boob. It is all I can do to keep my eyes open
right now. And she’s not even home yet.
I have taken full advantage of having these few days to settle in
while she bathes under the sun lamps in the hospital nursery. I have
learned how to crawl in and out of bed on my hands and knees. We’ve
unpacked and put away my overpacked hospital suitcase. Plus I’ve had
two in-house acupuncture appointments. That’s the great thing about
living in Chinatown. Dr. Wu is right next door. I needed to get in a
lot better shape to take care of her when she finally arrives home.
And I think that it worked.
I’m hopeful that tonight will be my last night that doesn’t include a
diaper change. In fact, I haven’t changed a diaper yet. Tomorrow is
our eighth wedding anniversary and I can’t think of a better gift for
Henry. (And me!) I failed Valentine’s this year. And I no longer need
the prenatal/couple’s massage I had intended to schedule for this
past Saturday. I’m glad I forgot to make the call.